Asexuality and Pregnancy

Happy Ace Awareness Week! I just wanted to take second to explore something I don’t often hear discussed in the community: pregnancy and asexuality.

I recently stumbled across a charming (and by charming, I mean soothing to my gothic soul) Tumblr blog, and one post in particular made my day. Eliza, the owner of aforementioned blog, is asexual, married to a man, and at the time of this post, was expecting her first child. She received a (surprisingly respectful) letter essentially claiming that her pregnancy and public asexuality  condoned rape.

Her response was extremely eloquent, and I’m not going to attempt to paraphrase its contents. It is very breif, here it is stright from the horse’s (or, in this case talented bloger’s) mouth: https://elisaintime.tumblr.com/post/93616866312/asexual-and-pregnant-and-thats-okay.

I do want to share just one thought provoking quote: “It’s true I’ve never given ‘enthusiastic consent’ to sex, but I have given loving, content, peaceful consent.” The bathrooms of the college I attend are plastered with posters reminding that consent to sex is “enthusiastic and ongoing”, and while I think defining consent more deeply than a lack of an arbitrary “no” is totally necessary, this post definitely has me wondering if the “enthusiastic” definition of consent is potentially problematic when applied to asexuals who willing (if not enthusiastically) engage in intercourse. Honestly, my brain is too fried from midterms to go into more depth, but I have a feeling this question will be in my head for a while, and if any of you have opinions, I would love to hear them.

 

Happy Asexual Awareness Week!

Until next time,

Keep ooooooon Aceing It!

 

2 thoughts on “Asexuality and Pregnancy

  1. Here are a couple posts you might find useful:
    https://freethoughtblogs.com/atrivialknot/2019/03/05/im-not-enthusiastic-about-enthusiastic-consent/

    And

    https://asexualagenda.wordpress.com/2015/01/11/mapping-the-grey-area-of-sexual-experience-consent-compulsory-sexuality-and-sex-normativity/

    And all the links within those posts.

    There have been plenty of discussions on enthusiastic consent not working for aces and a few other groups.

    Even in my comments here: https://luvtheheaven.wordpress.com/2015/05/16/i-was-curious-so-i-chose-to-have-sex-then-my-curiosity-was-satiated-i-decided-never-to-have-sex-again/#comment-401

    And you can look at the Asexual Activities discussions? Like this one? https://www.asexualactivities.com/post/161107444553/was-there-ever-a-time-when-you-did-something

    Or just search redbeardace’s Tumblr for the word “consent”, here is one of the poster that comes up: https://redbeardace.tumblr.com/post/157996920965/asexual-sex-ed-sexual-consent-while-asexual

    Etc etc

    Like

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s